I'M SICK

It's so funny.

I had a dream about him last night.

I really really tried to make myself feel better today with my daydreams,

But,

I remember when

Yeah, I laugh about it now but

It's really fucking annoying,

I REMEMBER WHEN

I FELT LIKE I UNDERSTOOD WHAT IT FELT LIKE

TO EXPERIENCE MANIA MANIA

BIPOLAR DISORDER

FELT LIKE A COMFORTING BLANKET

MY EMOTIONS ARE A FUCKING

UNCONTROLLABLE INSANE THING

FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKK

I remember feeling like

I could crawl inside his mind and

Experience a way of viewing the entire world

Exactly the way he did.

Like my way of viewing the world, see, was his!

I was him!

WHAT THE FUCK

It may sound enticing,

And I admit when I'm not experiencing it,

I look on it fondly,

Like a little pet I keep in the corner.

Only problem is,

I CAN'T FUCKING CONTROL THIS AND IT MAKES ME FEEL INSAAAAAAANEEEEEEE UUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

I remember feeling like

His arms were wrapped around me

Because my arms were his

He was me

He WAS ME.

HOW FUCKING DELUSIONAL DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO FEEL LIKE THAT

WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKK

am I a manic autogynephilic penis-injured war-torn traumatized rage-filled lonely sad space man bipolar penis-injury insecurity bipolar psychosis dragon supernatural god-like borderline personality disordered

PIECE OF SHIT.

My mind moves in circles,

Sometimes they're just there in the background for me to tap into when I want a hit of them.

But other times.

I become the man they whirl around

I become him.

I become him.

I become him.

It's not as fun as it sounds.

It's not fun at all.

I feel like a crazy person.

Like a stalker, a creep, it's

O B S E S S I O N S

Always,

For me.

I really am Harley Fucking Quinn.

Make no mistake.

I don't control my thoughts.

I don't own my obsessions.

It's only a matter of time before they

See something they like

And they

Move in and

E N G U L F M E A L I V E